Lattimore writes in a long, unrhymed line that tries to match the breadth of the Greek hexameter. His diction sits in an elevated, slightly archaic register: "hurled in their multitudes to the house of Hades strong souls / of heroes" keeps the Greek word order and a formal distance from ordinary speech. Wilson uses shorter lines in a contemporary register. Her Book 1 opening reads "which caused the Greeks immeasurable pain / and sent so many noble souls of heroes / to Hades," which is grammatically plain and moves quickly. In the Book 21 passage, Lattimore has Achilles ask "Why all this clamour about it?" while Wilson writes "Why are you so upset?" The gap in register is clear: Lattimore reaches for a slightly elevated word; Wilson uses the phrase a person would actually say today. Lattimore prioritizes fidelity to Homer's sentence structure and epithets, keeping phrases close to the Greek even when English has to bend around them. This produces a reading experience that feels foreign in a deliberate way, and it preserves features like repeated epithets ("grey-eyed Athene") that Homer uses formulaically. Wilson appears to prioritize clarity and forward momentum. In the Book 9 passage, Lattimore keeps the two-part structure of Achilles' choice close to the Greek syntax, while Wilson adds the line "Death cannot run so fast to overtake me," which has no direct equivalent in the Greek. That addition changes the feel of the speech. Lattimore gives less; Wilson gives a line that explains the emotional logic, making the passage easier to read and slightly more interpretive.
Sing, goddess, the anger of Peleus' son Achilleus
and its devastation, which puts pains thousandfold upon the Achaians,
hurled in their multitudes to the house of Hades strong souls
of heroes, but gave their bodies to be the delicate feasting
of dogs, of all birds, and the will of Zeus was accomplished
since that time when first there stood in division of conflict
Atreus' son the lord of men and brilliant Achilleus.
Goddess, sing of the cataclysmic wrath
of great Achilles, son of Peleus,
which caused the Greeks immeasurable pain
and sent so many noble souls of heroes
to Hades, and made men the spoils of dogs,
a banquet for the birds, and so the plan
of Zeus unfolded—starting with the conflict
between great Agamemnon, lord of men,
and glorious Achilles.