Green writes in verse, Graves switches between verse and prose depending on the passage. In the Book 1 opening, Graves uses rhyming couplets ("bold, / Stern spirits by the thousandfold"), which gives the invocation a hymn-like formality but also a sing-song regularity that flattens the Greek's forward drive. Green's verse is unrhymed and line-lengths vary, which lets the syntax breathe across lines. His diction sits in a contemporary register without being colloquial: "a sick piece of work, a two-faced / liar" in Book 5 is modern and pointed. Graves in the same passage reaches for "that renegade," which is recognizable but feels slightly dated. In the Book 21 passage, Graves writes plain expository prose; Green stays in verse and holds the scene together with shorter, harder sentences. Green prioritizes fidelity to the original's word order and epithets. He keeps "silver-footed Thetis," retains the two-fate structure in Book 9 as reported speech, and holds close to the Greek's syntax. This keeps Homeric repetition visible but occasionally produces slightly awkward English. Graves, writing in 1959, prioritizes readability and performance. In Book 9, he renders Thetis's prophecy as a quoted poem inside prose, adding clear rhyme and a direct second person ("you must, perforce, choose one"), which makes the moment vivid but adds material not in the Greek. The leaves simile in Book 6 shows this plainly: Green stays near Homer's four lines; Graves expands to eight lines with added imagery ("Cold autumn scatters them to rout"). Graves gives a reader a smooth experience; Green keeps the Greek's proportions visible.
Wrath, goddess, sing of Achilles Pēleus's son's
calamitous wrath, which hit the Achaians with countless ills—
many the valiant souls it saw off down to Hādēs,
souls of heroes, their selves1 left as carrion for dogs
and all birds of prey, and the plan of Zeus was fulfilled
from the first moment those two men parted in fury,
Atreus's son, king of men, and the godlike Achilles.
Sing, Mountain Goddess, sing through me
That anger which most ruinously
Inflamed Achilles, Peleus' son,
And which, before the tale was done,
Had glutted Hell with champions—bold,
Stern spirits by the thousandfold;
Ravens and dogs their corpses ate
For thus did Zeus, who watched their fate,
See his resolve, first taken when
Proud Agamemnon, King of men,
An insult on Achilles cast,
Achieve accomplishment at last.