Murray writes in prose, using a formal register that preserves some archaic coloring: "the wrath sing, goddess" follows Greek word order, and phrases like "putteth forth others" and "bourgeons" signal a deliberately elevated, period-appropriate English. Jordan writes in unrhymed verse with shorter, more regular lines and contemporary diction. In the Book 6 leaves passage, Murray gives "the forest, as it bourgeons, putteth forth others when the season of spring is come," while Jordan writes "the forest / prospers and leafs again when spring returns." Murray's sentence runs longer and feels more ceremonial. Jordan's lines are clipped and direct. In the Book 21 passage, Murray's "seest thou not" and "how comely and how tall" carry a dated formality Jordan removes entirely, writing instead "my own splendor, my size." Murray's prose stays close to the Greek syntactical structure and tends to preserve repetition and grammatical forms the original uses, which makes it useful for readers who want to follow Homeric habits of composition. Jordan cuts toward readability and spoken delivery, smoothing the connective tissue Homer uses to chain clauses. In Book 9, Murray keeps the formal parallelism of "lost is my home-return" and "lost then is my glorious renown," which reflects the Greek balancing structure. Jordan renders the same lines as "I will die soon but my fame will never die, / yet if I return home to my fatherland / I will forfeit glory," which reads naturally aloud but drops the rhetorical symmetry. Each choice changes what the reader notices: structure and texture in Murray, narrative momentum in Jordan.
The wrath sing, goddess, of Peleus' son, Achilles, that destructive wrath which brought countless woes upon the Achaeans, and sent forth to Hades many valiant souls of heroes, and made them themselves spoil for dogs and every bird; thus the plan of Zeus came to fulfillment, from the time when first they parted in strife Atreus' son, king of men, and brilliant Achilles.
Sing, goddess, of Peleus' son Achilles' anger,
ruinous, that caused the Greeks untold ordeals,
consigned to Hades countless valiant souls,
heroes, and left their bodies prey for dogs
or feast for vultures. Zeus's will was done
from when those two first quarreled and split apart,
the king, Agamemnon, and matchless Achilles.