Fitzgerald writes in measured verse, keeping lines relatively compact and choosing a register that feels formal without reaching for archaism. His opening gives "Akhilleus' anger, doomed and ruinous," where the double adjective carries weight without strain. Johnston's lines run longer and land in a register closer to plain speech: "that murderous anger which condemned Achaeans / to countless agonies." His version reads more like an English sentence that happens to be broken into lines than like verse shaped by ear. In the Book 21 passage, Fitzgerald's Achilles says "face your death, you too," clipped and cold, while Johnston's says "you too must die. Why be sad about it?" The difference in line length and word choice shows two distinct ideas of what an oral epic should sound like in English. Fitzgerald prioritizes sound and compression. In the Book 6 leaves passage, he adds "old leaves, cast on the ground by wind, young leaves / the greening forest bears," giving the Greek's contrast a shape in English that goes slightly past the original words. Johnston stays closer to the Greek sequence: "In winter, winds blow them down to earth, / but then, when spring season comes again, / the budding wood grows more." His version is easier to follow on a first read and makes no additions that might surprise a reader checking against the Greek. In the Book 9 speech, Fitzgerald cuts Thetis's name and condenses sharply, while Johnston names her and walks through each condition. Fitzgerald takes more interpretive risk; Johnston gives more of the text's explicit content.
Anger be now your song, immortal one,
Akhilleus' anger, doomed and ruinous,
that caused the Akhaians loss on bitter loss
and crowded brave souls into the undergloom,
leaving so many dead men—carrion
for dogs and birds; and the will of Zeus was done.
Sing, Goddess, sing the rage of Achilles, son of Peleus—
that murderous anger which condemned Achaeans
to countless agonies and threw many warrior souls
deep into Hades, leaving their dead bodies
carrion food for dogs and birds—
all in fulfilment of the will of Zeus.