Fagles writes in a looser free verse with noticeably variable line lengths and a higher tolerance for dramatic compression. His opening "Rage" lands as a single word before the sentence even begins, a choice that forces a pause the eye and ear both register. Johnston's version opens with a verb: "Sing, Goddess, sing." The repeated word steadies the line and makes the invocation feel more ceremonial. In the Book 21 passage, Fagles has Achilles say "Come, friend, you too must die," and Johnston gives "So now, my friend, / you too must die." The line break in Johnston slows the moment down. Fagles runs at a slightly higher rhetorical temperature throughout, where Johnston's diction stays cooler and more even. Neither reaches for archaic forms; both are recognizably contemporary. Fagles adds emotional coloring the Greek does not always put on the surface. In the Book 5 passage, his Athena calls Ares a "manic, born for disaster, double-dealing, lying two-face god," piling up adjectives that go beyond the Greek's compact phrasing. Johnston gives "that madman, born evil, that fickle god," which is shorter and keeps closer to the original's rhythm. Johnston's translation prioritizes clarity and a readable forward pace; Fagles prioritizes performance and dramatic weight. What Fagles gains is intensity and theatrical presence. What Johnston gains is directness and a text that does not add interpretive pressure on top of the Greek. The Book 6 leaves passage shows this plainly: both render the image accurately, but Fagles adds "living timber" where Johnston simply says "budding wood."
Rage—Goddess, sing the rage of Peleus' son Achilles,
murderous, doomed, that cost the Achaeans countless losses,
hurling down to the House of Death so many sturdy souls,
great fighters' souls, but made their bodies carrion,
feasts for the dogs and birds,
and the will of Zeus was moving toward its end.
Sing, Goddess, sing the rage of Achilles, son of Peleus—
that murderous anger which condemned Achaeans
to countless agonies and threw many warrior souls
deep into Hades, leaving their dead bodies
carrion food for dogs and birds—
all in fulfilment of the will of Zeus.